One of UniversityOfWalesAberystwyth ‘s HallsOfResidence

Residents of Penbryn include:

  • Students
  • Cockroaches
  • Assorted Beetles
  • Rats
  • Loliver

Penbryn’s kitchen are abysmal and shared between about 20 students, so it’s probably a good job there is Branwens for them all to eat at.

Penbryn, or Pengrim, as it is affectionately called, is a hideous hideous place to live. The toilets look like they could be stolen from cell block H (as do the wardens), the kitchens look like warzones, and the rooms are, essentially, whitewashed holes with windows and a broadband connection. The most annoying thing about living in Pengrim is the termly room inspection, in which the hall manager comes round, checks the state of your room, and gives you twenty four hours notice to clean it up if you haven’t been a good boy. Otherwise, you have to pay for a cleaner to come in. It’s bad enough to have them wander into the room whenever they feel like it, but it’s the being told off like a naughty fucking schoolboy for not keeping the room tidy when I’ve paid thousands of Good english pounds on it really pushes me over the edge. Makes STMH seem like the ritz carlton.

Notorious for turning the heating off whilst it’s snowing outside.

Surely its not that bad? I mean, christ, thats my home next year…

^^ Don’t delude yourself. wispy

OK then, what is it really like? Is it like so bad that it becomes funny? Positives please?

No carpets to speak of, bit of plaster board seperating rooms, prison-style painted brick walls, weekly dawn fire alarm test + evacuation, freshers, streakers, porters, communal toilets/bathrooms…

I seem to remember a urban ledgend that went around about a crabs outbreak in the late 90s after a laundry cockup. Probably believable if not true.

I see, well i cna deal with freshers cos thats me next year. And erm… the crabs… theres cream for that right?

You’ll likely develop a series of deeply loving and sexually exciting relationships with other residents, although you probably won’t be aware of them.

Erm…Thanks for the advice. Problem is Ive already selected Penbryn for my first year. Not botherd about noise, steakers and rats really… as long as the showers are ok?

Heh, Well..Well Well.. If and I mean IF you can time it that you get a shower before some piss-stain has used all the hot water. You can get a hot shower.. though, The actual hygene levels of said showers?

I caught some nasty skin thing from the showers; I later found out my next door neighbour “peeled” his rancid feet in there just before I went in… I subtly prankd him for the rest of the year. –Ultima