Idiots, mongs, scopes – call them what you will. You can find them…well anywhere. Anywhere you go there will be some sort of knob there trying to rip you off, beat you up or generally get on your tits. Some of them can be categorised as follows:

The Knob: The original breed of twat that just gets on your tits through actions or words

The Chavy or Townie: Often found listening to garage and wearing Bling, also known as Kappa Slappers

The Know-All: You’ll know them by the phrase “Actually in my opinion, thats totally wrong.”

The Mardy-Arsed: Complain about EVERYTHING. If it’s not to their taste then you won’t hear the end of it.

Anyone in the entire world who even slightly enjoys anything to do with Pokemon

and finally… David Blaine: That stupid git wizard moron who’s constantly doing moronic stuff that isn’t for charity and unleashing his lies and deciet amongst the populous. When he dies and is called to justice before God the angels shall weep for it will be the first time they hear God use the word “Tosser”. I wish he HAD died in that box to serve as a stern warning to all other numb-nutted wizard scum who have similar aspirations.

I hope you’ve learned something today.