A medical condition sweeping through the student population of Aberystwyth at an alarming rate.
The disease is typified by;
- Increased heart rate and sweating at the mention of “Beans”
- Spontaneous emotional outbursts
- Inability to control basic language and motor skills when confronted by SAS
- Thoughts of depression, despair and suicide
- Frothing at the mouth and wild spasms when attempting to learn
- Extreme frustration often leading to Man-Machine violence
If you, or anyone you know starts to display 2 or more of these symptoms they must be reported immidiately to you’re local authority’s centre for Disease Control. Do not approach or attempt to reason with a sufferer, they will be illogical, confused and tending towards violence.