[edit]
2005
30th November
<tom> there's still got to be a lot of money to be made out of sellin love on the internet <tom> (sorry for spelling mistakes, sticky keys)
25th November
<bingone> i was like "hmm, they probably pick up people at 5 in the morning cause most people up at that time are criminals" <bingone> then i was like "hmm, maybe thats harsh" <spectre> aye, people with unusual sleep patterns must be criminals <bingone> then i concluded "oh wait, he was spray painting, so he was a crim! theory PROOVED" <bingone> i'm going to submit it for peer review <bingone> edit tell irc <spectre> haha <spectre> taking stuff out of skips is technically a crime too <bingone> aye <spectre> so thats two criminal acts in one night <spectre> oh my <bingone> hahaha <bingone> a "crime spree" i think criminologists would call it <spectre> hahahahahaha <spectre> rofl <bingone> or a "one man crime wave" others might say <bingone> ONE MAN CRIME WAVE IN ALL NIGHT SPREE, DISCARDED PRINTER STOLEN <spectre> BOARDED UP SHOP SPRAY PAINTED <bingone> In unrelated news, Charles Clarke eats civil liberties
20th November
<Oliver> don't preach to me fatso <Mr_T> Oliver, was it you I saw going into a fat fighters meeting? <Oliver> yeah <Oliver> i misinterpreted the sign <Mr_T> hahaha <Oliver> i thought it was fighting fat people :< <feebalo> hahaha
19th November
<bluec> list of funny words please <bluec> off the tops of ur 'eads <bluec> i wish jonneh were here to help :< <parag0n_> flange <parag0n_> gibbon <parag0n_> ham <bluec> you guys are terrible <bluec> DAMNIT I FORGOT HAM
9th November
<spectre> <RobChurch> spectie: Burst a paper bag in his ear; he'll think it's a terrorist attack, scream "identity cards" and dive under a table. <spectre> re: charles clarkes visit to UEA <spectre> <Joolzer> Charles Clarke wouldn't fare come anywhere near here <spectre> <spectie> Joolzer, where are you? terroriststan ? <bluec> capital city: atrocity
7th November
<braingrind> CDImage.ape: data <swb> haha <swb> cool <swb> its data <braingrind> well it wasn't going to be peanut butter
2nd November
<swb> Mr_T, so what are you doing <swb> having a shower? <swb> making some cheese on pasta <Mr_T> swb, avoiding you <swb> Mr_T, HAHAHAoh wait, that was rude <Mr_T> the further from you I get, the less I seem to receive stupid comments and judgements <spectre> haha Mr_T <swb> but how will you evaluate what is right and wrong? <Mr_T> I've decided to live my life using 82ask <swb> your primitive cerebrum can barely handle the complexities of feeding yourself <Mr_T> "should I get dressed?" <swb> hahaha <swb> "which chippy shall I go to" <swb> "is this enough pasta?" <spectre> hahahahhahahahahahahaha
30th October
<wispy> I hit him with my calculator.. he took it. <wispy> I wanted to spar :(
23rd October
<matchew> mathcore doesnt REALLY exist <matchew> its just another "emo" thing <bluec> neither does reggae <matchew> lol <bluec> it's just black people talking when stoned
19th October
<Jonneh> von, consider this scenario <Jonneh> a machine is created that constantly measures the ammount of food in some sort of trough <Jonneh> a sign saying 'YOU WILL BE SHOT IN THE FACE IF THIS TROUGH WAYS LESS THAN x POUNDS' <Jonneh> then introduce a cow into the machine <Jonneh> the cow is sitting right infront of the sign <von> Jonneh: cows can't read <Jonneh> if it eats the food it obviously longs for death and can be eaten by you <Jonneh> hahaah sure <Jonneh> for someone with so much respect for animals you sure like belittle them <spectre> Jonneh, hahahahahahahaha
<braingrind> spectre, close your door <spectre> aber was rad <braingrind> i can hear your typing <spectre> not very good for jobs tho! <spectre> and no linguistics masters! <bluec> wtf i just realised #aber has the same name as the uni we all went to!!!1 <Jonneh> haha spectre types like a rapist <braingrind> spectre, CLOSE DOOR PLZ <braingrind> i want to sleep <braingrind> with computie off <braingrind> and i don't want to haer you LAUGHING and then TYPING and then LAUGHING
11th October
<bluec> what <spectre_> gloom, i wasn't asking that <spectre_> i was asking if you were on the rag <spectre_> which isn't the same thing <spectre_> pregnant women don't go on the rag <bluec> the rag is like pregnant without the responsibility <spectre_> (unless i'm about to make my sexual naiviety blatantly obvious) <hypno> hur <hypno> no, they dont <spectre_> i could have checked the wikipedia <bluec> hahah <spectre_> but i thought i'd go with what i 'knew' <bluec> "wanna have sex?" "hang on, i'll just check the wikipedia.......................... yes" <spectre_> HAHA <hypno> hur <bluec> BE RITE BACK, HONEY, JUST GOOGLING THAT
5th October
* aziramai (~l@AAnnecy-251-1-70-60.w83-201.abo.wanadoo.fr) has joined #aber <spectre> beefalo <spectre> URGENT QUESTION <spectre> <spectre> oi beefalo <spectre> <spectre> could you cross a horse with a mouse? <spectre> <spectre> i got into an argument with braingrind * aziramai has quit (Quit: ) <parag01> i'm sure she must get an awesome overview of IRC life in those little 2 minute visits :P
24th September
<null> I have a plate, a spoon and a quilt <Mr_T> toff
14th August
* gloomy (~icechat5@ACD7C387.ipt.aol.com) has joined #aber * Ultima gives channel operator status to gloomy * Ultima has quit (Quit: Chatzilla 0.9.68.5 [Firefox 1.0.4/20050511]) <Jonneh> man he must have gotten tired of opping
24th June
<@slashtom> read what happened to Soddom <@slashtom> Soddom was a city <@slashtom> and it was destroyed, for its crimes <@aimaz> slashtom, only a man and his two hot horny daughters got out alive <@aimaz> so they fucked their dad iirc <@slashtom> aye <@slashtom> they got him drunk first <@aimaz> the same daughters he had previously offered to the mob to do with as they wanted <@slashtom> no, they wanted the angels <@slashtom> not his daughters <@aimaz> if my parents told a mob to sex me as much as they wanted I'd be pretty angry at them <@aimaz> i certainly wouldn't be in the mood for procreating with them <@slashtom> it was different in those days <@slashtom> and you're not a woman <@slashtom> the mob were a bunch of homos <@aimaz> hahaha, that's a keeper
4th June
<jtn> shit.. my own house doesn't like me <jtn> walked out the pc room and the door frame twatted me <jtn> ... got me own back.. went for a piss and forgot to lift the lid up.. <jtn> that'll teach the bastard <bluec> haha jtn <jtn> i tell yer.. ter gotta keep in control
27th May, 2005
<annie> want to try some saliva later? <annie> erk <annie> Mr_T, <Mr_T> wat <annie> Mr_T, want to try some saliva later? <Mr_T> NO annie haha ok <Mr_T> I'll try salvia though <Flux> WOT?! <annie> ah <annie> lal <annie> CON <annie> FU <annie> S <annie> ED <Flux> annie in gay for Mr_T shocker
22nd May, 2005
<Mr_T> water buckets only start fires when they're made of potassium <bluec> "Set fire to yourself? Follow these easy steps: 1) Scream" <Mr_T> or something <bluec> gotta love things that violently react with water <Mr_T> except fran
17th May, 2005
<spectre> beefalo, recognise <beefalo> no <spectre> :<
<Dan> it seems i cant update my repositories... <spectre> hmm <Dan> keep getting connection refused to server, error 111 <spectre> tried doing: <spectre> export http_proxy="http://wwwcache.aber.ac.uk:8080" <spectre> before doing the update? <Dan> dude, you possibly know too much.... <spectre> haha <Dan> took fucking ours for me, hypno, von, swb and other to fail at fixing it <Dan> because i set the proxy using the GUI... <spectre> linux is pres2clik when you know the right pres <Dan> qut pres2clik actually mean? <spectre> haha <spectre> PRES 2 CLIK <spectre> you know <spectre> CLIK 2 PRES
5th May, 2005
<Oliver> i have an empty bean bag <Mr_T> aww <Oliver> and a bin bag full of beans <lucy> so to speak <Mr_T> hahaha
2th May, 2005
--> moriarty (~3eb2443d@nozomi.ivixor.net) has joined #aber <Mr_T> hey moriarty <moriarty> hey all <moriarty> nothing more to say. bye <-- moriarty has quit (Quit: CGI:IRC (EOF)) <aneurin> lol moriarty
8th April, 2005
<@slashlaptop> just sent an informal web eng quote off <@slashlaptop> 2.5 days worth, at starter rates <@bluex> lol i hope ur bankrupt <@bluex> sorry that was instinct <@slashlaptop> wtf have i done to you? <@Dan> LOL <@bluex> http://www.newscientist.com/channel/life/mg18624941.700 <@slashlaptop> you wish failure on me, why? <@bluex> slashlaptop: because within the context of your imagination bound reality i find that somehow my reactionary rediculing of your actions makes my life far more enjoyable <@bluex> so suck on a huge black cock and gag about it <@slashlaptop> i hope i prove you wrong <@slashlaptop> as you are clearly a wanker! <@bluex> slashlaptop: i dont care if you do or if you dont <@bluex> i dont know you, you're funny to laugh at, your business is part of your persona <@bluex> without it there would be no lolling <@slashlaptop> "funny to laugh at"? <@bluex> it's entirely a matter of fact hilarious mockery of your personal life <@bluex> i dont see why you're so upset
<spectre> "i don't have a mobile phone, i don't have a car, i barely have a pair of shoes" <spectre> "don't worry mr. morton-tyers i'm sure you'll get a pair of shoes some day" <bluec> haha <Aimaz> hahaa <bluec> who was that? <spectre> telesales ^_____^ <bluec> hahaha <Aimaz> spectre: win <spectre> he's like "don't you have a mobile phone?" <spectre> "you know, a mobile phone is a necessity not a luxury nowadays"
April, 2005
<Munky> So who has taken time off / out to watch the popes funeral? <Mr_T> time off from what? <Mr_T> IRC?
March, 2005
<slashtom> afternoon Dan <Dan> wow, slashtom, you said that just as it turned 12... your clock is well synced <slashtom> your clock is out of sync <slashtom> it was 15 seconds passed 12, when i entered that line <slashtom> i sync against an NTP stratum 2 clock <Dan> ah... that would explain the weird feeling of the world ending i've had lately
<swbn> I just walked into aimaz's room in time to see a tiny man climbing into a womans vagina <swbn> where he stayed forever <hypno> thats aimaz's room for you
<Mr_T> I heard if you stand in a public toilet and say "shigs" 5 times, matthew orlinski appears behind you <bluec> i heard you had to say shigs 3 times then bend over
<Mr_T> http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/05/africa_fishing_festival/img/7.jpg <bluec> haha <bluec> DARKEY AND A WATERMELON
<Jonneh> i'm nerdy as fuck <Jonneh> i just spent that last hour listening to a big band remix of popular nintendo songs <Jonneh> mainly from the mario and zelda games
<Mr_T> !google lyrics dying fetus grotesque impalement <ivixor> Result: http://lyrics.duble.com/lyrics/D/dying-fetus-lyrics/dying-fetus-grotesque-impalement-lyrics.htm (Dying Fetus Grotesque Impalement lyrics | lyrics by Dying Fetus) <Mr_T> lol <Mr_T> I Am Lost, Far From The Cross You Stand Before, Filled With Lust, We Are All Filled With Lust, We Want This Whore, Impale Your Flesh, Draped In Darkness, Your Guts Explode And Life Has Ceased Behind Your Eyes, Impalement, And Before, Live No More, Live No More, Overcome By Fever, Malevolent Disgrace, Wretching With Repulsion, Bleeding From The Eyes, Fester With Redemption, Your Blood Begins To Clot, Clogging The Corpulses In Your Mind, Ignoring The Pretention, Wallow In The Rot, Seven Lives Have Come And Gone, The First And The Last, And What Are We Even Here For? Some Twisted, Mindless Game? Or Is God Just Playign Tricks Upon My Brain? The Birth Of Death Begins, And With Your Life It Ends, My World Emmersed In Hate, Destroy What I Create, Deficate, Choke On My Shit, Urinate, Drown In My Piss, Godless, Hater Of The World, Your Mind Dwells On The Absurd, As I Contemplate Your Horrible Demise, Blood Streams Down Your Face, Drained, Drained Of Life <Mr_T> lmao <hypno> lols <hypno> sounds like what joey would write in a christmas card
February, 2005
<Mr_T> SAM SAM TAN <spectre> HAHAHA <spectre> FIRE SAM <Mr_T> aye <Mr_T> new fireman sam on s4c looks all modern <Mr_T> and detailed <spectre> Mr_T, does it have socially realistic plot lines? <Mr_T> spectre, I only caught the last bit, but I made out "would you like a chocolate biscuit?" and Norman said thanks <Mr_T> he took a biscuit and it ended <Mr_T> so, I guess YES <spectre> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA <spectre> LOL
<Jonneh> i'm going through this town then some coon aggros me, so i kill him, and this kid comes round and starts throwing stones at me, so i give him one between the eyes and now i'm branded a child killer <Jonneh> and nobody will talk to me
January, 2005
<Jonneh> what the fuck <Jonneh> here's a list of people who arn't funny <Jonneh> ... <Jonneh> tom green <Jonneh> ...
<parag0n_> god does talk to people. we just put them in loony bins now <slashtom> i'm not in a loony bin * slashtom listens to Iron Maiden: Children of the damned
<Mr_T> wow, I just got given a shag <spectre_> whatever <spectre_> last year i saw two pairs of breasts
<spectre> forins are coal <spectre> SOME ARE COAL COLOURED!
Following exchange happened in REAL LIFE <Mr_T> Where's that Ritti? <Spectre> Gone for a walk with Jon-Carl <Mr_T> Brazen hussy <Braingrind> *farrrrrt* <Mr_T> Nice input braingrind <Mr_T> edit: output